Sunday, March 01, 2015

A weekend alone is not quite what I had in mind, however it is a blessing to have a little solitude to get everything in perspective. Why does life have a habit of pulling the rug from under you, without giving so much as a whiff of explanation?

I am well versed in the art of hyperbole, but that doesn't mean the smaller changes don't have a large impact. 

The Summer has been decided and I am to return to the Shire instead of Brighthelmstone, to take a more responsible role as governess, patron? I'm not sure what to call myself other than Duchess. I may be rather unconventional, with my choices of travel and governing and teaching and learning but I wouldn't change my life for anything.

Though the Summer has been put in my diary, the months that succeed it are more than questionable. The Duke and I have continued our conversation and have come the conclusion of 'Que Sera Sera.' Normally I thrive at the unknown, I enjoy spontaneity and recklessness (for want of a better word!) however, I cannot help but feel that I shall miss out on some opportunities if I don't go out and get them!

I'm not even sure what opportunities I am referring to, only that this perpetual state of indecision doesn't agree with me. 

If it were up to me, after my Summer in the Shire, I would call another country my home. Giving my heart to an unfamiliar landscape, discover a culture that I am currently unaware of and learn another language that is foreign to my ear. It is what I have done since leaving the Northern counties the first time round and it seems that old habits die hard.

But not if I have to choose between travelling and the Duke... That is a decision I hope never have to make.

D. S. 

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