Wednesday, December 26, 2012

I do hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! I know I enjoyed the mulled wine, mince pies, carols and company of my family immensely, even when they are driving me around the twist. It's all a part of Christmas, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

Of course I have more to write about than Christmas tidings; the blonde Esquire has kept true to his word regarding his intention to court me; the White Knight seems to have left my life with a noble farewell for the last time; and the New Year is just around the corner!

The past week has been filled with much merriment, and the blonde Esquire has provided the majority of the entertainment. We have dined and danced and dallied with all our spare time in the hope to appease his Mother. I have yet to meet her, but I have heard from the Esquire she is pleased with his progress. I wonder how long we will have to keep up this artificial pretense, but for now I am enjoying spending time with the blonde; we scheme and laugh without a care in the world. It is delightfully refreshing to spend time with someone without having to worry whether or not their intentions are true, or indeed having to behave as expected!

The White Knight however returned and made his purpose quite plain. He is to leave again for some battle abroad but hoped to return to a wife and the mother of his child. I was aghast at his presumption, and told him so quite smartly... We exchanged a fair few words and we both left each other with our egos bruised. I don't know what came over him; I was quite looking forward to his return. How was I to know that it was marriage he wanted?

I have, in the mean time, heard once again from the Captain. It is most sporadic but I do smile when I receive such correspondence. However I fear that time and distance have taken its toll on our feelings for one another. I will always remember him fondly and maybe... In the future? I shan't give up hope completely.

But now I have to plan the New Years Eve festivities (and of course consider my resolutions) and decide what theme, what invitations and what scandals may or may not occur. The blonde Esquire has given me his word that he shall attend as to whatever Ball I may throw, and Belle has written to say she shall join us in the Shire. I look forward to Armiger's company this afternoon and I do hope this, the final week of the year, has fewer surprises than the penultimate.

D. S.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Not a day had passed since my last post when I received a long-awaited correspondence from the gallivanting White Knight. My thoughts have been plagued with decisions (something we all know I find troublesome at the very least) and I have busied myself with Christmas antics so as to distract my thoughts.

The blonde stranger took a rather unexpected turn over these past few weeks; I expected to hear very little of him, or from him, but it seems he had other ideas. The very same day the White Knight blasted his presence back into my life after weeks of neglect, the blonde stranger showed up on my doorstep, most impromptu, and stole me away for several hours... What we did, well I shall not share all, but I've discovered his stature and his intentions.

The blonde stranger is of landed gentry, an Esquire of the Shire, who had heard through the rumour-mill that two Ladies had ventured out into the big wide world on their own. At first I was a little tentative, for he kept the truth hidden behind an innocently coy charm, but he was not shy and he kept a most respectful distance (to start off with).

Apparently his Mother had sent him to court either of the Duchesses so as to woo their hearts and confirm a betrothal in order to gain a higher standing in court. I was surprised by his honesty, shocked that his Mother had such a hidden agenda planned out for her son, but after talking it through... It is exactly what every daughter is subject to from the moment she is born.

Of course I asked why he had been so honest with me, I could comprehend his Mother's cunning scheme, but his honesty? That was almost disturbing! Was it just a ruse to get closer to me? How had he made his choice between the Duke's sister and myself? Did he see me as an easy target?

Affronted, I tore away from him, marching down the garden path back to my home, but the blonde Esquire soon caught me in his arms, staring down into my eyes, his hands upon my body felt natural and almost familiar. I attempted to struggle against his firm hold, but to no avail; I eventually had to give up, short breaths escaping from my open mouth in exhaustion.

He smiled at me, and kissed the tip of my nose. Of course I motioned to refute his advances, but he stopped me with a finger held to my lips and said, 'I don't want to marry you. I don't feel the need to increase my social standing. I love my freedom, I love my family, I love my Mother. I don't want to disappoint her by not trying to make you fall in love with me, but I also don't want to run the risk that you may end up getting hurt.'

The blonde Esquire sighed heavily and let me go, turning away from me. I stared at him, willing him to go on, as I tried to catch his eye.

'You could cause me a lot of trouble Duchess, but if you trust me, and I know I'm asking a lot, I do have a plan that may suit both of us.'

He held out his hand, and who am I to refuse the plight of a young man?

It was soon after our rendez vous that I received word from the White Knight, but I am finding it easier to ignore his beckoning. I cannot jump every time he calls my name.

Of course this plan with the blonde Esquire may go awry: we are to start courting in the run up to Christmas, we shall spend time together and appease his Mother in his valiant attempt to gain my heart. But after a few months, we shall have an awful row about another woman he has been fraternising with behind my back and then that shall be all.

Personally I am looking forward to the challenge!

D. S. 

Monday, December 10, 2012

Oh how I do love the Christmas festivities! Everyone seems to be in such jolly moods and there is goodwill to all men. Of course I am referring specifically to the time spent at the Christmas Ball on Friday night, but I shall get to that, eventually.

I had the most wondrous pleasure of the Court Jester in the City of Dreaming Spires last week; we dined and talked as if no time at all had passed since our last encounter, little realising that over a year had slipped by. We talked of many things, fools and kings, both in our retinue and those further abroad. I do hope we will manage to coordinate our lives accordingly so as to spend more time together than we have done previously.

However upon my return to the Shire, my ladies were all a flutter about the ever approaching Ball. I cannot deny that my heart was in my chest; not only because this would be my first outing as an independent woman, standing on my own two feet, but secondly I'd had another glimpse of the blonde stranger... Intrigued would be such an understatement!

I cannot say what it is that beguiles me, but I am drawn to his 'je ne sais quoi', the knowing smile is ever so tantalising and yet, he does not mean to make it easy for me. I daren't ask his name, for fear that the spell will be broken.

Thinking of brokenness only hardens my heart: I read somewhere that if you are in love with two people you should always choose the second, for if you were truly in love with the first, you would never have fallen in love with the second. As much as I long for the Captain, he is somewhat displaced within my thoughts. I think of him almost carelessly, like the words to a much loved and much heard song; a lullaby that will never be forgotten, but is all too soon grown out of...

Ahh yes, the Christmas Ball. I was on my best behaviour (for a change) and enjoyed the game the blonde stranger played with me; catching my eye and making me blush! The subtle flirtations were rather hushed compared to my more brazen approach, but I do enjoy the chase and the indication of what is to come!

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I, for I cannot get the anonymous blonde out of my head, and for some silly reason his every mention makes me smile... 

D. S.

Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Hedonism is judged of poor repute by most in society, an over-indulgent, self-imposed, ill-disciplined waste of time. Personally, I don't quite see what's wrong with living for the moment, it doesn't have to be taken to extremes, but I can't understand the necessity to worry about the future when we have very little control over our lives anyway!

Last weekend was wonderful; dancing until the early hours of the morn, challenging our new found neighbours to deplorable acts, sharing stolen moments that cannot yet be repeated and laughing mercilessly at nothing in particular.

The soirée was a little more exuberant than the Duke's sister and I had first intended, but isn't that always the way? It is nigh on impossible to have a 'quiet night in' with friends!! Or at least with the friends that we have!

Our neighbours have easily been included in this circle of familiarity; a Lord and Lady live the closest, and they are somewhat more sensible than the Duke's sister and myself, but I did catch a glimpse of mischief in their eyes as they petted their enormous hound. A gorgeous bitch from the Continent, she contrasts slightly with the smaller pooches I am used to, but she is full of the joy of life, and what's there not to like about that?

Indeed all our guests were most entertaining, regaling tales of the Shire that even I was unaware of! It seems there is scandal wherever you may look, most of it unfounded, but the rumours, gossip and lies are easily spread, like a virus with no purpose other than a cause for destruction.

I feel those who fall in its path for I remember what it is like (after the incident with the Irish cream...) to have rumours follow you; and I can imagine it is only made worse when there is no substance to the truth of it! Those who are pathetic enough to make up rumours surely need to find something more constructive to do with their over active imaginations?

But I shall not dwindle on about untruths for there is something FAR more exciting to talk about...

An invitation to a Christmas Ball!

Who am I to refuse the delectable sights and sounds of the Shire when my name is printed upon gilt paper, tempting and taunting me to go and enjoy myself? Of course I shall attend, I look forward to the company of a blonde stranger from last weekend, and I can't wait to dress up for the festive season.

Indeed I intend to travel to the City of Dreaming Spires today to find a suitable dress and hopefully spend some time with the Court Jester and Armiger!

D. S.