Thursday, January 06, 2011

Ignored by the musician. Unimpressed doesn't even begin to cover it. I am tempted to go on a rampage to prove a point, but that would go against my New Year's Resolutions (which there are many) and I do not want to admit that he is having an impact on my emotions!


I know he is working hard, and unlike me does not appreciate distractions, but I am so angry and hurt and jealous. There are not enough words in the world to describe how I feel right now.


(Later)


I apologise about my rant. I know that I should be able to cope with being ignored; it is not the first time, nor will it be the last and who knows how I even feel about this frustrating musician... Other than God.


Speaking of God, this afternoon has passed while I have perused many books in the library. My most interesting find, for it must be called that, is a romance novel about a young girl called Fanny Hill. I suppose that 'romance novel' is probably the wrong term, and though I didn't manage to read it all I can only imagine what course it took... I found it very interesting, but when I inquired after it to my tutor I received a firm telling off and was made to promise to confess my sins!


Is it wrong that I find this rather amusing? Of course, I am even more intrigued as to the novel, though I have subsequently found out that it is to be banned! And if I am to confess for reading about carnal activity, Lord only knows how a priest would react to my own devious past!


I can see the room where the musician is at work, the door is ajar and my heart is beating subtly faster, but I daren't make my presence known. I refuse to fawn over any man.


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D. S.